No, not as in hair. A few years ago I home colored with a wash out in a couple of weeks sort of thing in my OWN color (what a waste)… BUT someone had put permanent haircolor in BURGUNDY in that box. And I? Did not notice and used it anyway. Then, had to chemically strip hair, which turned it fluorescent orange with pink streaks and started something at our house called Hat Day so that one of the kids would stop laughing and pointing. Have not touched haircolor since.(End of tangent.)
Highlights (H) and Lowlights (L) of Friday morning:
This is how Caden-2yr gets dressed. Keep in mind that he JUST turned 2 (shout out to the Geekwif for noticing and commenting, like the DAY that happened), and is not yet proficient – although determined -to dress himself. Many highlights and lowlights occur during this 20-40 minute process. (Yes, you read that correctly. 20-40, y’all)
a. you give him clothes, preferably in a size too large, since he insists on dressing himself and this makes the process somewhat easier.
b. He tries to put the shirt on incorrectly in every way possible while you ‘coach’ verbally only.
c. should you give in to the EXTREME temptation to reach out a help physically he will scream. loudly. and undo whatever it is you just did and glare at you. (L)
d. while getting himself dressed, he walks backwards. (H, because it’s adorable) This results in much tripping. (L) Then you must kiss whatever got hurt. Bottom, foot, whatever. But DO NOT try and take advantage of his close proximity and sneak in any helping or, refer to c, above.
e. give all kind of verbal coaching, like, stick an arm in there. no, there, THERE! no…. no…. yes…. THERE!
f. Competely go insane several times. (L, L, L)
g. This is the MOST important step. Once he’s dressed, you must clap and cheer and smile. (H)
h. If Caden-2yr does not think you’ve made enough of a fuss, he will direct you to keep clapping for him, and keep cheering and even kissing. Do not dare appear as if you have lost your mind, which OF course, you have. Repeatedly, as described in step ‘f.’
And if you’re in a hurry, and should be so brave as to dress the kid against his will so that you can leave the house without nudity involved, he will scream and flail and rip off all his clothes. repeatedly. then? then you repeat steps a – h. extra emphasis on step f.
Highlight:
I’m in the car with all three boys this morning and a certain catchy tune comes on. I’m either on the XM 80s or 90s station. No idea which. And before I can stop myself I’m – with fierce attitude and un-coolness galore – belting, "YO V.I.P, Let’s Kick it!"
Yes, y’all, those are the opening words to "Ice, Ice Baby" which I did not know I knew until that moment.
Huge highlight for me, big lowlight for Ethan-5yr:
Ethan-5yr gasped in horror. Then started yelling, "MOM! I NEED GODLY MUSIC. I DON’T THINK THAT’S GODLY MUSIC, AND ONCE YOU CHANGE THE SONG, I NEED YOU TO STOP SINGING AND BE VERY VERY VERY QUIET."
Me, shocked, and obeying the weirdo in the back, changes the station and starts laughing.
Ethan-5yr: "MoOOOooom. I REALLY MEAN IT. THAT WAS HARD FOR ME TO HEAR AND NOW I NEED THE PEACE OF THE LORD, SO PLEASE BE QUIET RIGHT NOoooOOOW."
Me, shaking with silent laughter because my five year old just told me my singing traumatized him, and he begged me with sincere desperation to stop so he could have the peace of the Lord. How religious and eloquent of him!
Oh. My. Gosh. I love that kid.
I love you.
2:21 pm
hi,
(and i love your blog!)
i’ve been reading your blog for awhile, and i wanted to say omg ethan is totally adorable!
Natalie
2:52 pm
Smart kid!
3:25 pm
I really am LOL!!! This is too funny! The dressing the two year old part is so very familiar. Especially the part where you help and so they scream, then undo everything you did and then glare at you. Verbatim that’s what we do.
And Ethan, is uber adorable! (I used uber just for you.)
4:31 pm
Awwww. How Cute! Doesn’t it feel weird when your kids give you advice and sounds kinda like….YOUR parent? Too funny!
Tootles,
Stephanie
4:33 pm
I read your comment over at Jen’s site. The baby (a little girl) is fine.
Your site looks very sweet…can’t wait to come back and visit again!
4:49 pm
LOL!! Smartie Pants!
5:01 pm
I am so sorry, but I loved so hard at your story, tears were flowing down. Your 5yr old is just too funny.
5:24 pm
Tell Ethan I’ll take a little of that peace in the Lord if he has a mind to share.
I say let ‘em run naked. Less laundry to fool with.
5:45 pm
love it!!!
Mary
6:26 pm
I remember those learning how to dress days. Same rountine…arm there, no there…! Ugh, I’ll have to go through it again in about a year.
Isn’t Ethan sweet!
6:28 pm
That is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
6:37 pm
I totally remember going through that stage with my second, don’t worry it only lasted a couple years.
I went through a somewhat similiar experience with hair dye, over twenty years ago. Someone switched black with the blond I thought I bought. Yeah, I looked real HOT with gray hair at age 22.
6:54 pm
Bwaaahahaha, the peace of the Lord. That is hysterical. I didn’t know 80s music was ungodly. Im was more of a Van Halen girl myself..
I just added you to my linky link list. I thought I had added you but I couldn’t find you. Not you, you. Your link, you.
7:00 pm
Oh my goodness, Ethan cracks me up.
9:01 pm
hehe your kids are funny!!! Ooo the things I have to look forward too!
chelle
9:09 pm
I loved that song in highschool, even had a dance routine to go with it:) I was laughing so hard at the Ethan bit, I read it outloud to my hubby on the couch and started laughing all over again, am still smirking:) Funny, funny stuff!!!
9:20 pm
Oh my goodness! I laughed hysterically through that entire post! I don’t know what’s funnier, Hat Day, Caden 2yr stepping backwards while he dresses, or Ethan 5yr’s “I need Godly music,” and “I need the peace of the Lord”. The whole thing just had me rolling!
9:39 pm
My 2yo is at the I tan’t stage. Can’t pronounce t either. He still wants me to do everything for him.
Love the story about the singing!
10:20 pm
I couldn’t help but laugh!! Your kids sound so sweet. The singing in the car reminds me of us- I love to sing, but my kids get embarrassed.
Thanks for visiting me-
10:40 pm
if my kids act up, which is frequently (they are 18, 5 and 3, all with special needs), I threaten to sing. Usually that does it!
Sometimes, I actually START singing and they run like wild horses, away, away from MOM!
Your life is a good place, isn’t it? I am glad you share it with us lucky folk.
11:31 pm
You’re too much!! I’m getting my hair highlighted tomorrow, your making me have second thoughts because I’m going to a new gal! Oh, and I want my daughter Victoria to meet Ethan! LOL
3:39 am
Hey, I read this earlier and had to rush off before I commented. Something about keeping the peace of the Lord in my house.
Yes, girl, it’s clinique Bonus Week, but it’s almost over!
9:17 am
Hilarious! Touching! Darling! And no more color for you.
9:37 am
I use semi-permanent color myself–Natural Instincts, recommended by the snootiest hairdresser guy in town for when you can’t afford HIS color. Just so’s you know…
Very funny about your 2-year old trying to dress himself! Sounds oddly familiar. The good news is that of course he’ll get better at it. At least he hasn’t figured out that he could also choose his outfits! My 7-year old is still wearing her Christmas socks with big reindeer heads sewn onto them because I keep forgetting to retire them.
11:48 am
I found your blog today. I needed that. LOL
You have just earned a spot on my links bar. I will be back.
Proverbs 17:22a A cheerful heart is good medicine,
12:06 pm
I just read your 99 things. I had a deep belly laugh over some of that. You are a great writer. I didn’t go to the prom either. I was homeschooled in High School. Back in the 80s when it wasn’t cool. (think Doogie Howser meets the Beverly Hillbillys)
There must be something wrong with some of your fam to not like you. ??? Some of mine don’t because I prefer honesty and truth over keeping the peace. I’ve always pray for more grace because people are so entirely stuuuupid sometimes. See, I told you I need more grace.
Married immediately? We did too. Just under 5 months after we met. Love is indeed blind, but they didn’t warn us it’s deaf, cannot speak and broke too. That makes it all the more special almost 13 years later. He’s a fabulous hubby.
I figured daughter 11, 7 years..I get it! 2nd time around. Stuff just happens. Glad to hear things are happy now.
K, done with my mondo comment. ehmm, post.
8:16 pm
Hiya — Found your spot of blog real estate via Tony Whittaker’s newsletter, and thought I’d let you know I mentioned your site on one of mine (linked below). I also blog over at http://bloggedyblog.blogspot.com , so stop by and say hi.
AC
9:17 pm
You keep me LOL!! Are you this funny in person? Funny Kiddos too.
11:34 pm
Oh, my! Your kids are SOOO cute! My son is three and he’s starting to dress himself, with similar results. His problem is mainly that he HATES having anything over his head if he can’t see out of it, so shirts that don’t go over his head easily (like you said, a size too big) he freaks out and pulls it off, even when he’s very close to having it on, throws it on the floor and says, “I’m scared.” However, Mom can’t put it on him either, for the same reason. So, a hooded sweatshirt, on a day that it’s needed, is a very tough battle.
My daughter is now 16 and she got me out of a bad mood one day by saying, in the car, when I stressed and worried “about many things, “Didn’t God make a beautiful world??” I wish she was interested in Godly music now. That’s what I listen to (I found a Contemporary Catholic radio station on Live365.com) and it drives her crazy because I like the Catholic Rap. She says it unnatural for MOMS to like Rap. It’s JUST WRONG!
10:08 am
I tell you… I can’t even take a single weekend off, because I MISS EVERYTHING!
This is simply adorable and too cute!
I must stop talking now… and be silent … so you can enjoy the Peace of the Lord.
hehehe too cute.
2:40 pm
I’m in love with your blog. ROFL!!! Too friggin’ funny! I”m loving the part about the music. This morning I was grooving to the radio in the car and looked back at my 2 year old son who was glaring at me and covering his ears. Oh, the love.
5:46 am
That’s just about the cutest thing I’ve EVER read!!!