Thursday, May 18th 2006
What I Wish People Knew…

We have a bathroom that’s a decent size, and there’s a little ‘toilet closet’ at one end with a door. This tiny room has its own lightswitch and fan. I wish my husband knew that the fan feature is useful, and to try it every once in awile.

I drive a Luxury MomMobile. Last week the lady at a drive thru leaned out the window and asked if it was really nice inside as well. No one was in line behind me, and the place seemed deserted. I asked her to come see, if she wanted, but that it was probably dirtier inside than whatever she drove. She declined, horrified I’d even offered, and apologized repeatedly for who knows what. I wish this lady knew that Luxury MomMobiles don’t make you any different than anyone else – I know since I’ve driven far more cars on their last legs than she ever would have guessed.

I wish people knew that there isn’t a difference between loving adopted and biological kids.

I wish my high school English teacher and former friend knew I still think of her fondly. (I know, I know, but could YOU contact your high school English teacher if you punctuated stuff like I do?! Gah.)

Which makes me think that I wish my high school English teacher and former friend knew that such punctuation could actually be considered an art form, and should be appreciated. Because then I’d email and say ‘hi.’

I don’t like breakfast. I wish my family knew this well enough to not make me big breakfasts for holidays. I gag down the thoughtfully prepared meals, and try to smile, but i. hate. breakfast. Especially on holidays.

I wish my sweet church family knew that when they invite me to church get togethers, or ‘fellowship’ things, and i say, "umm, maybe, sure…," what I really mean is, "NUH UH, NO WAY, and please don’t even ask."

I wish a fantastic publisher knew that I’d written an inspirational chicklit manuscript that might make a good book. I know that they DON’T currently know this, since I’ve never sent it to any of them. But I wish they just knew.

I wish my dear husband knew that when I say something like, "I only have seven more pounds to lose," the correct response is NOT: (shock and awe) "REALLY? That’s ALL?" And not on Mother’s Day, either. 

Well, in all fairness, he probably DOES know that. Now.

~hm

56 Comments on “What I Wish People Knew…”

1
Lauren
May 18th, 2006
9:35 pm

Sometimes when I get in that whole “I wish” mode, I listen to the inspirational styling’s of Hilary Duff’s “Fly.”
I’m totally serious.

2
millicent
May 18th, 2006
9:50 pm

ok..so what is the mommobile?
lol…my husband LEAVES THE DOOR OPEN so that when I walk by I almost pass out from the fumes!

3
Paula
May 18th, 2006
9:54 pm

I almost spit my tea out on the first paragraph and the last paragraph was the icing on the cake. Great post!!! Thanks for making me laugh.

4
Shannon from Rocks in my Dryer
May 18th, 2006
10:02 pm

Yes, I want to hear about the mommobile.

And I WISH HOLYMAMA KNEW that church potlucks aren’t nearly as painful as she thinks. Especially if I’m there, and I bring my fruit salad.

5
Lei
May 18th, 2006
10:09 pm

Yes – do reveal your luxurious mommobile! ;)

6
cheeriobutt
May 18th, 2006
10:16 pm

I want a picture of your mommobile, pleeaase! Oh and next time hubby’s in the “special” room, make nasty farting sounds outside the door and it just might get him to turn that fan on! :0 Yeah and when my hubby says “that’s all!” I give his tummy a jiggle just for good measure! By the way….love my church people but HATE functions! Soo many “expectations” and I just don’t get the whole woman, social, manner “thing” and I can’t cook (SCARY) and so I end up just freaking everyone out and stuff! So don’t feel bad I hate those too!

7
peach
May 18th, 2006
10:40 pm

I WISH HOLYMAMA KNEW that if she’d send that chicklit manuscript into a fantastic publisher (maybe even the one I work for) and they put it on the market . . . I would definitely purchase it and let everyone know I knew her when I could read all her wittiness and hilarity for free!! Thanks for the late night giggle, Kelsey. You are a hoot.

8
boomama
May 18th, 2006
11:00 pm

I had a professor in college who made a huge difference in my life, and she passed away before I had a chance to tell her how much she’d meant to me. I wonder if she ever knew….

I’m just sayin’.

Email that teacher. :-)

9
owlhaven
May 18th, 2006
11:08 pm

Girl send that manuscript around to some publishers!!! See what happens…

Mary

10
chelle
May 18th, 2006
11:12 pm

hehehe!! My husband turns the fan on then leaves the door open!!!

Great wishes!! May they all come true!! Especially the publisher one!

11
Addie
May 18th, 2006
11:41 pm

Now that’s a momma for ya! You choke down breakfast for them on Mother’s Day, just so they won’t feel bad! :D

Oh, and, send that manuscript in already!

12
Rebecca
May 19th, 2006
12:10 am

A candle works nicely. (For the bathroom, not the manuscript.) Maybe that’s what your husband wants for Father’s Day.

13
oshee
May 19th, 2006
12:19 am

HM-
I’d take peach up on that inside track offer!

You could just leave that fan on all the time. If he asks why, just say ‘Since you don’t know how to turn it on…’

I enjoyed this post. Made my husband actually look up from his laptop to see why I was laughing.

14
Sara
May 19th, 2006
5:34 am

I love your posts! Thanks for all that you share.

15
Jeana's mama
May 19th, 2006
7:34 am

Contact that teacher. She will be soooo pleased to hear from you. The fact that you *write*—-never mind the punctuation—will be a great gift to her.
I see this from both ends. I did contact my favorite English teacher from high school to tell her I finished my PhD, and she cried. She said I was the first to contact her.
And when a former student takes the time to call or write or e-mail me, no matter what the reason, even if it is just to say, “Hey, I remember you,” it makes my day, my week, my year.

16
Randi
May 19th, 2006
8:00 am

Thank God my hubby uses the bathroom fan wisely!!!

You definitely need to send in your manuscript–the worst that can happen is that they will send it back, but who knows? Maybe someone will publish it! ;)

17
Diane
May 19th, 2006
8:52 am

SEND that manuscript in NOW!

E-MAIL that friend/teacher IMMEDIATELY!

I, hereby give you permission to go for your dreams, say what you mean, and duct-tape that fan switch in the on position whenever your husband is nearby! And if he keeps saying things like–”Oh really!?!~?!?–duct tape his mouth! :)

I hope you know–how much you bless our lives–each and everyday!

Diane

18
Kristina
May 19th, 2006
9:25 am

fun post to read. thanks for doing that. great idea.

19
Carol
May 19th, 2006
9:32 am

I wish I knew … something. Anything is fine.

20
Heather
May 19th, 2006
9:38 am

Great post! I also wish that publishers just knew about manuscripts. I mean they’re supposed to be smart. Why don’t they just KNOW these things! Have a good one!

21
Stacey
May 19th, 2006
9:55 am

I wish HolyMama knew that I get really nervous going to church things, too!

I wish HolyMama knew that I hate breakfast, too!

I wish HolyMama knew that her old teacher and former friend would probably love to hear from her and not care about punctuation!

I wish HolyMama knew just how fun she is to read about and probably hang out with!!

22
angiearmstrong
May 19th, 2006
9:58 am

my mom used to order pork-fried rice from the local take-out chinese restaurant and dump it in her blue-flowered corelle baking dish with the glass lid and take it to church potlucks. people would beg her for her recipe, but she would tell them it was a secret. she’s my hero, someday i hope to be just like her.

23
julie carobini
May 19th, 2006
10:56 am

HM,

I don’t eat breakfast either, even though I keep telling my girls it’s the “most important meal of the day.” Blech. Don’t tell.

I love my church and the people in it. But usually from afar :-)

Finally, SEND THAT MANUSCRIPT OUT!

Happy weekend!

24
emily
May 19th, 2006
11:24 am

loved this entry; i HOPE you email your english teacher, i know it’d mean the world to her.

also – about the manuscript — what have you got to lose? the worst that can happen is they’re not interested in publishing it, but there are lots of publishers out there, and you are HILARIOUS!

25
Shalee
May 19th, 2006
11:48 am

I’m not wishing you knew this… I’m telling you now: I love the way I smile after visiting your blog. I love your personality and your look on life. I love that although you are shy in person, you are so outgoing and likable on screen (which would probably would translate to in person if I had the chance to meet you!)

See how easy that was to do? Now go and do it for all your other wishes, especially the breakfast wish because I am in complete agreeance with you on that one!

26
April
May 19th, 2006
12:36 pm

I wish HolyMama knew that just because a teacher knows and teaches about “proper” punctuation doesn’t mean that she judges others for their more “creative” punctuation.
I also wish HolyMama knew how much it would mean to her high school English teacher and former friend to know the impact that she had on HM’s life.
And I wish that everyone knew that when God nudges us to contact someone it may be more for the other person’s benefit than for our own, so we really should listen to Him. He really does know best.
(Email her, Kelsey!)

27
Gibee
May 19th, 2006
1:00 pm

GiBee wishes HolyMama knew that she wants to meet her face to face and have a ride in that bohonkus mamamobile … maybe to WalMart … I have an ironing board I need to buy.

Let’s see … what can someone that doesn’t cook take to a church dinner… oh, yeah … how about salad from the salad bar, thrown in her own pretty bowl, pre-tossed with some yummy salad dressing, and a gorgeous chocolate fudge cake from the bakery? Yeah, that’ll work. And here’s the secret … get a table that only your family and maybe your best friend can sit at, spread out, and don’t let anyone bug you. Fellowship. It’s all about fellowship.

Love ya!

28
J's Mommy
May 19th, 2006
3:57 pm

I wish my husband knew about the fan too. Oh and I also wish he knew that farting isn’t funny anymore. I used to laugh at the silly sound, but it’s just plain disgusting now!

29
aggiejenn
May 19th, 2006
4:06 pm

As a former English teacher, I wish HolyMama knew that we just like to hear from our students. Especially ones that have gone on to be fantabulous writers. And we don’t care about correct punctuation. That’s not cool anymore; creativity is. And we also don’t care about sentences that start with and. Or but. Or or. :-) Have a happy weekend!!

30
Heather
May 19th, 2006
4:54 pm

Yeah, I wish some publisher knew about my manuscript too. Sigh. Unlike you, though, I have 10 rejection letters to remind me that THEY JUST DON’T KNOW how damn good it is! :-) Now it sits on the shelf collecting dust, because I just couldn’t bare to go past 10.

31
flipflopmamma
May 19th, 2006
9:08 pm

you mean, it’s not polite to use the potty with the door open? oops.

32
Cindy
May 19th, 2006
9:23 pm

I think you should contact your teacher. It might make her day.

33
Muley
May 19th, 2006
11:27 pm

Sounds like there’s an interesting story your husband could tell about that last one. As soon as he gets out of traction, that is.

34
Perri
May 20th, 2006
12:19 am

Amen on the adopted child love issue. Great post. Lots to think about and laugh about.

35
eph2810
May 20th, 2006
12:45 pm

I wish some new some stuff about me too. Like, I am not as boring as it might seem.

36
Magnolia
May 20th, 2006
3:41 pm

Love your site. Especially the April 15th and 29th posts. I agree with the others. Send out that manuscript. You have a great sense of humor.

37
Brenda
May 20th, 2006
11:51 pm

Chiming in here to say by all means send out that manuscript. I like your style and your great sense of humor, and obviously I’m not the only one.

Ditto what April said.

38
Paula
May 21st, 2006
6:11 am

About the blogging chicks. They let me set up a separate page for the blogroll, see my tabs at the top of my home page. Just a thought… Love for you to join!

39
Supermom
May 21st, 2006
8:10 am

That blogging chicks blogroll is a pain. Sorry, chicks.

I’m curious…why do you hate church functions. Not that I blame you, but I am curious.

40
H.A.Page
May 21st, 2006
9:26 am

I still write letters to my fourth grade teacher. She encouraged my reading which has been foundational to my writing. I will forever be grateful and I tell her that all the time. Contact that teacher! Mentors make all the difference and it is the significant “others” who plant the seeds.

Remember that Margaret Mitchell had her manuscript turned down more than anyone I can think of and how legendary her Gone with the Wind became. Have faith.
Love your writing. Still trying to find my voice and niche as a newbie.
Cheers.

41
Ruth
May 21st, 2006
11:14 am

ya know what? i hang out with my kindergarten and grade 1 teachers now!!!! it’s so weird. they want me to call them by the FIRST name and it just seems kinda strange. :)
but special too.
i agree with the others – hunt down that teacher and give them a hug!
shalom!

42
Karin
May 21st, 2006
11:59 am

Contact your teacher! I would love it if a former student contacted me to tell me I made a difference – no matter what their punctuation looked like. :)

43
Jade
May 21st, 2006
1:48 pm

ROFL!!! That was too funny! Thanks for the chuckle!

Your Sister in Christ,

Jade

44
Faith
May 21st, 2006
5:15 pm

I also drive a luxurious mom-mobile. It really is quite beautiful – when washed on the outside and not covered with goldfish on the inside!!! ;D

45
Pink Chihuahua Princess
May 21st, 2006
6:38 pm

I really wish that people knew there was no difference in loving a biological and adopted child. I’m especially passionate about this issue because I am raising my husband’s daughter, she calls me mom, and her biological mom takes no interest in her. It tears my heart in shreds how many people ask me when I’ll have a child that I can really love (i.e. a biological one). I genenerally respond with a pretty smarty pants answer. Good for you, realizing that love goes beyond the traditional family boundaries.

46
Nicole
May 21st, 2006
7:17 pm

Thank you for the comment! I agree, I do need to put on some fake courage if need be and just a little spicy. You’d think I’d be able to do it. Check out my blog again in the next few days. I am going to post a huge ‘confession’ of sorts. I know I’ll be coming back to yours! You’ve offically been blogrolled!

47
Janet
May 21st, 2006
7:44 pm

My senior year I had a high school English teacher who was excellent. He was cool because he was professional, but also became friends with some of us. I wonder how he is from time to time.

48
Heather
May 21st, 2006
8:25 pm

I’m currently coveting a bathroom fan. We can barely turn around in bathroom without hitting a wall. Thanks for stopping by my blog.

49
Lena
May 22nd, 2006
1:37 am

Thanks for assuaging my guilt that I turned down another invite tonight for about the 15th time. Who invites people over for just dessert anyway??

50
Suzanne
May 22nd, 2006
5:34 am

we gotta know….
what sort of MomMobile do you drive?

Suzanne
http://suzannebalvanz.blogspot.com/

51
kate
May 22nd, 2006
8:13 am

Yes Yes Yes – Love the wish list… I am so with you on these…

52
Jamie
May 22nd, 2006
9:46 am

Yes, yes, double yes, and oh, heck YES!

(And now I want to read your book! We need more Kristin Billerbecks in the world and honey, I’m not it.)

53
Jenn
May 22nd, 2006
2:04 pm

You should totally send in that manuscript and email that teacher :)

54
Theresa
May 22nd, 2006
11:08 pm

All I can say is 54 comments on your blog without having a prayer request…I think that person needs to be read by a publisher, don’t you??

55
kdubs
May 25th, 2006
5:58 am

Ohhhhhh do send the book!!!!
:)

Kdubs

56
Gayla
May 31st, 2006
3:46 pm

Thanks for inspiring me to fill the rest of my day thinking about all the things I wish other people knew.

What a hoot!

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