Friday, September 8th 2006
UPDATED: Quick update

your comments made me laugh, cry and think. And I was giggling over how many of you were somehow inspired to use a version of the word ‘piss.’ An awful lot of you.

The littlest boys got together and vowed to stage a Nap Strike, which could also be called, No Blog Time For Mom. And I’m having a bridal shower here on Sunday, but I"ll be back soon.

Mike is alive, well, and sincerely sorry. I gave away 8 flower arrangements (The Kelsey) to someone who could get them to appreciative recipients.

This Quick Update is now UPDATED:

You’re right, Mom. I have no idea why i imagined lots of use of a certain p word in the comments section from the previous post. It only appears twice, and that is not nearly as often as I expected. Perhaps lack of sleep. I don’t know.

To all the concerned men: Mike has the fanciest PDA there is, and he uses it well. He has the neurological capabilities (Ken! Really?! Dude, that was lame. The ‘would you get mad at him if he had no arms and didn’t hug you..? Oh man. Seriously. Mike has a calendar, a PDA, a personal assistant, and a CEO’s brain that is perfectly neurologically capable of allowing him to acknowledge my birthday. But OH that cracked me up, so thank you for taking the time – and creativity – to come up with that. And really? Marriage can’t be about ‘me’ on my birthday…? Hmm. Okay. It wasn’t. And that worked out really well for us the last two years. Now let’s try it my way, and make it about me that one day next year, and I bet we’ll have a happy girl!)

I think I learned one day recently not to blog when really tired. but clearly not. Hm.

You know, I bet some of you don’t think I should be quite so open and honest about some stuff. Particularly stuff that might make people close to me not look their best. Ahem, MIKE.

i’m ok with that. Wanna know why? Because if you sugarcoat everything, then there isn’t any glory when there’s a transformation. What if next year I wrote a post about how Mike remembered my birthday and gave me a card? Would it mean a thing if I’d never been honest about him forgetting it in the past? Nope. Another key point here is that i know it doesn’t detract from WHO he is that he forgot. And i mentioned that Ethan-6yr stole from the store the other day. does that make him ‘less than’ other 6 yr olds? Nope. It means that day he learned something, and I’m perfectly fine with that. in fact, i’m glad there’s a written record of it.

Life is what it is. And people are who they are. I don’t believe in hiding the ugly in me or anyone else. Yes I can be flighty and shallow and eat too much chocolate and be too sensitive and lust over nice shoes. And that’s a good picture of who i am RIGHT now, no sense in pretending otherwise. But what if we put me on some sort of Personality Makeover Show and they erase those tendencies in me? We could oooh and aahhh over how reasonable I am and how i eat sensibly and appreciate my frugal footwear (ha!), but would it matter if the Personality Makeover Show edited out the "Before" version of me and only showed what I was like once the transformation was complete? Nope. No one would care at all. Big deal.  You can’t appreciate the Afters if you sugarcoat the Befores into nonexistence.

Should there be any change in the ‘ugly parts’ (mine, Mike’s, Ethan-6yr’s or anyone else’s), then it sure is easier to appreciate that change if you clearly saw the flaws first. And flaws aren’t anything to be afraid of, after all.

They’re just potentially dramatic backdrops for future success.

So there. :D

~hm

19 Comments on “UPDATED: Quick update”

1
Diane
September 8th, 2006
9:02 pm

Nap strike! Oh no! And with a shower at your home. Naptime was such a gift in the middle of the day…while my kids have long outgrown naps–NOW, I take them! No nap strike gonna’ happen here anytime soon. Naps are a keeper!

Diane

2
EmLouisa
September 8th, 2006
10:38 pm

I HATE No Blog Time For Mom. My husband was just asking me today what I was going to do when my 2 1/2 year old gave up his nap. I told him to never speak of that again. Right now, I don’t even want to think about it.

3
Blond Girl
September 9th, 2006
1:37 am

You know, I agree. I want to see all sides of everyone, especially those I like, love, want to emulate, etc. We’re humans with free will. Having something to overcome is what gives us victory. Without the valleys, a mountaintop is nothing more than a really high plateu, right?

Thanks!

4
Stephanie
September 9th, 2006
6:41 am

Well said Blond Girl!! You are so right Kelsey and I bet you get alot of comments saying that this was the reminder they needed to remember that it is ok to have flaws and maybe even laugh about them sometimes. In this crazy world we live in it is sometimes hard to just be you, NOBODY is perfect(not even that Victoria Secret model,lol). You are so real and that is why I love reading here:)

5
Geekwif
September 9th, 2006
8:53 am

Good point!

6
Barb
September 9th, 2006
9:29 am

I completely agree. There are some things that just aren’t mine to share with the whole world but for the most part, I don’t try to sugarcoat who I am OR who my family is. And I don’t really care to keep up with anyone who obviously does. How boring is that? I love it that you’re open and honest. Gee. Your day-to-day life and your emotions are actually normal!

7
Stacey
September 9th, 2006
9:34 am

You go girl! I like knowing the real you. If you were the fake you on here and then I met the real you I would be disapointed in many ways! Keep being real and being who you are RIGHT now : )

8
Bg Mama
September 9th, 2006
10:09 am

You are so right about not appreciating the after if you don’t see the before. Thanks for being real.

9
Blaine
September 9th, 2006
10:36 am

Perfect response!

10
Lauren
September 9th, 2006
11:08 am

I don’t usually talk about my husband disappointing me on my blog for one reason and one reason only, hubby would be crushed. I know him and I know he would see it as disrespect.

You on the other hand have a very different husband than I do. We emailed briefly about this before. No one has the right to judge you for what you write here about Mike except Mike, myself included. I see your point about transformation and not only do I agree but I love that you defended yourself. I also love that we get the real HolyFamily not the white-washed version.

Thanks for the reality check.

(I hope this made sense)

11
Tess
September 9th, 2006
2:04 pm

That’s a great way to look at it. I mean, we’re all here to read about your holy happenings anyhow, and sometimes they’re unholy :)

12
Laurel Wreath
September 9th, 2006
4:10 pm

I have not thought of that point of view, and I have to say “yippee, I love it and I totally agree with you”. I would want “real” you as opposed to “sunshine, always happy you”.

13
Rebecca
September 9th, 2006
5:23 pm

I’m so glad you posted this, and seriously thinking about printing it and carrying it around in my Bible.

Here’s why:
1) Heavy on my heart these days is a friend of mine who just ditched her husband and children for another “life”. She is a Christian, we were prayer partners, but she never mentioned ANY frustrations with her husband. If she had, perhaps they would not have seemed so severe/I might have offered some perspective.

2) Part of the painful process of change in my life now is adjusting to my own personality deficiencies. I HATE the idea that I am the cause of my own problems. But I love the idea that it’s okay for you to be imperfect, because I love you anyway, and I can love me anyway too.

That was kinda messy, wasn’t it? Oh well!

14
Brony
September 9th, 2006
11:09 pm

I hear you all the way on your responses. You can’t live life in a bubble, somewhere over the rainbow. It’s the here and now. That’s what we’ve got. Love it or hate it…it is what it is.

Hope you don’t lose the nap times.

15
Heth
September 9th, 2006
11:13 pm

I love blogs that keep it real. Sometimes the sugary version just kind of makes me sick to my stomach because people really aren’t all perfect are they? And if they all are, then what am I doing wrong?! Love ya Kelsey, keep the real-life coming.

16
April
September 10th, 2006
9:46 pm

The purpose of my blog is to serve as a journal of my family’s growth, and my own. An obvious purpose of your blog, in addition to that, is support. Aside from one comment, it seemed that your readers were supportive about your disappointment. But really, if we aren’t honest about our disappointments, no matter how minor they might seem to someone else, then what’s the point? I can’t support someone if I don’t know they need it. So yes, we could all lie and paint beautiful pictures of our lives…or we can be honest, get to know one another, and lift each other up. I vote for friendship, myself.

17
Shalee
September 12th, 2006
1:34 pm

Kelsey, the reason I have loved getting to know you is because I AM GETTING TO KNOW YOU, not some plastic-y Barbie of a blogger who has the perfect life and everything down pat from head to toe. (Well, maybe the toes…) Please keep being you. That’s the person that I am admiring from afar, until October that is. I’ll be admiring you to your face then.

And I think you’ve describe the reason for realness quite perfectly. I really liked that look at life.

18
GiBee
September 13th, 2006
10:49 am

Dear Mike: Hi! You don’t know me, but you’ll have the awesome honor of meeting me in October when we all gather in Fort Worth — lol(those poor people)…

I’ll make a deal with you … since Kelsey will NOT put her birthday, mother’s day, anniversary, etc. on your PDA, I’ll give you a subtle reminder when I see you so you don’t forget to put it in for next year… I can tell she loves you mucho, mucho, mucho … and it would probably make her feel all mushy in the knees if you would wish her a happy birthday right before getting out of bed and hand her a flowery card and stuff, and then call her again at mid morning, at mid day, at mid afternoon … oh, you get the picture!

Kelsey — Don’t despair… it should only be a couple more years, and then, Mike should be fully trained in the fine art of remembering!

Happy Belated Brithday, friend!

19

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