Wednesday, November 21st 2007
Soooo Not Festive.

Hello, from the Land of Biscochitos. Or not, since we can’t find them ANYWHERE, even though Maria Rosa’s Traditional Biscochitos seem to be manufactured right here in Albuquerque. Note to Maria Rosa: WHERE ARE THEY?!

Keep it up on the BSE’s y’all! I’ll give you a couple more days before drawing a winner, so be sure to read the post below, do that BSE, and leave a comment very soon. YOu might be rewarded with a super-rare biscochito delivery if I can ever find them.

So we’re here for therapy and for a visit with Kim-13yr. Mixed feelings. Stress. TMJ acting up. (Which means that my jaw will be so sore on Thanksgiving there will be no massive pigging out for me, which is not necessarily a bad thing.)

Just a couple months ago we were here and Kim-13yr’s therapist had her draw a picture of the scene where she kills me. Nice. Stick figures. She with a grin, me with tears, in the kitchen. Big Freaking Knife. Lovely.

Now there’s an exercise in empathy for ya. Have your kid draw THAT, and then your job is to totally focus on how difficult and painful and scary that must be for her.

That was two months ago, but just this week she’s been deemed as ‘backsliding’ in her progress. Backsliding? From the knife in the kitchen scene? Great. It was hardly a great place to be, with very little room behind to slide, you’d think. But no.

On Thanksgiving, we’re having our first Day Pass in almost a year with Kim-13yr. Perhaps the timing of this could be better. Perhaps the knives in the kitchen will be removed. Perhaps the TMJ won’t matter at all, because would you really feel like eating?

And yep. This is why I usually don’t talk about this.

On the bright side, if your relatives are really driving you nuts on THanksgiving, you will so easily be able to think, “Well…. it could definitely be worse… At least Uncle Bob is just annoying with that crazy laugh and I THINK I could just die if he touches me again, but at least he doesn’t have a Big Freaking Knife.”

I don’t mean to seem ungrateful for all of life’s blessings. I’m just really not looking forward to the holiday where we express such thankfulness, gather around with the kids, and wield a big turkey carving knife.

~hm

13 Comments on “Soooo Not Festive.”

1
cindy
November 21st, 2007
10:40 am

Hi Kelsey. just noticed a word worth clinging to . ‘ IS ANYTHING TO HARD FOR ME?’ I was told some bad news awhile back, walked outside crying and into a beautiful sunset as the Lord spoke those words to me .So beautiful and comforting. I love seeing them. always brings me back to a sunset promise.
Hope you will experence some Peace.and Sunsets In the midst of this difficult time.

A massage wand helped my jaw.Worth a try?

Love in Christ. Cindy
(What’s a BSE?)

2
Candice
November 21st, 2007
2:30 pm

Wow sweetie! I didn’t realize things were THAT hard with your daughter. I will be praying for you over the holiday, and I will keep your daughter in my prayers as well. Keep your chin up and trust in the Lord. God bless.

3
LaLa
November 21st, 2007
4:26 pm

Call me any time. I vote for putting the knives in hiding. I’m very thankful I’m going to see you in LESS THAN A MONTH! Big, enormous, Yankee hug. (They do hug well up here – it’s so cold and all – although their cornbread leaves a lot to be desired.)

4
Linda
November 21st, 2007
6:58 pm

Nope Cindy…Nothing is too hard for God!!! When you look around at his creation (mountains, ocean etc…) ain’t nothing too Hard for Jesus!!!

I will keep you in my prayers! You are a strong woman!

5
kate
November 22nd, 2007
4:09 am

Hey Kelsey,
I am really sad to hear that Kim is backsliding. I hear your frustration and know it’s got to be a huge burden to bear. I will be praying for you all this weekend. You are really on my heart. :)

6
Pastormac's Ann
November 22nd, 2007
7:36 am

You’re here in my neck of the woods – wish it were under better circumstances.

Try “Way Out West” Biszcochitos – you can pick them up at any ABQ Walmart. Maybe not as great as Maria Rosa’s, but they might be an acceptable substitute.

Perhaps during one of your NM we could meet for a coffee/tea/soda.

Praying for your visit.

7
Grim Reality Girl
November 23rd, 2007
4:03 am

I am so sorry. I know this has been a long struggle that you do not share often…. know that you are not alone. Prayers are going up for you and your family. I can not imagine, nor do I want to. May life bring you more joy and less pain. May the knives be dull. May you laugh and smile. May the hate drain out of her…. Wishing you peace.

8
Karla
November 23rd, 2007
5:21 am

Our prayers are with you all. Wish we were at the NM house to visit with you all. And we could go in search of biscochitos. I figure if our kids can find bear tracks, they can surely hunt down some cinnamon-sugary cookies for us! LOL HUGS to your family from ours, and many Thanksgiving blessings to you.

9
Cmommy
November 24th, 2007
2:05 am

{hugs} I have a sibling who suffers with paranoid schizophrenia, so I know a bit about crazy. I wish I’d had the opportunity to know you better when we were in Texas last Oct. at the get-together. I still have my nametag :-)

btw, love your haircut and the photo is perfect!

10
geekwif
November 24th, 2007
4:39 pm

Wow, what changes since I was last here! The new design is lovely!

I’m so sorry to hear that things aren’t looking up with your daughter yet. What a long, hard road you and your family has been down. I wish there were some perfect set of words to fix it all at once, but for now I’ll pray that God will prove himself faithful and restore your family soon.

11
Jan
November 25th, 2007
1:13 am

(((((hugs)))))) Kelsey, miss you and love you and hope the holiday is better than forecast.

12
Holy Mama! » Club 17 Winner!
November 26th, 2007
3:15 am

[...] response to all the comments on the ’soooo not festive’ post, thank you. No knives were present at the table, as all turkey arrived ‘magically’ [...]

13
Lorie
December 1st, 2007
2:27 pm

Kelsey,

This may be inappropriate to write, since I don’t know you at all. But it has struck me a few times when you talk about Kim that you always refer to her as your daughter, not your step-daughter. That really says something about your committment to your family. Where your heart really is, even though the situation is awful, and not your doing. You go, kid.

Lorie

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