Wednesday, December 5th 2007
Diffusing Disgusting With A List Format

1. Today caden-3yr had an opportunity to coin a new word. Poop-anado. That’s a combination of the words Poop and Tornado. I was blessed not to see the specimen that inspired this word.

2. Night before last, I found out it is entirely possible to sleep through a baby throwing up all over the bed. I sleepily rationalized that those ‘cold spots’ couldn’t possibly be vomit, because it would stink.

3. My stupid sense of smell betrayed me and did not bother to wake up and smell the puke.

4. Despite #3, I don’t drink heavily. (Or at all, actually) I’m just a sleep deprived mom.

5. Mike would have woken up, and probably even cleaned it up, but he was experiencing great favor from the Lord God Above, and was out of town that night. (A logistical oversight issue I later found necessary to discuss with the Lord God Above.)

6. Seth-2yr also got VERY sick in the car, taking Caden-3yr to preschool the next day. Caden-3yr was seated directly behind Seth-2yr and didn’t see the action.

7. Caden-3yr’s sense of smell was wide awake.

8. Caden-3yr asked what happened. I told him. He asked, “What kind of throw up is it?” I thought about it. Looked back at Seth-2yr, and said, “Brown.” Caden-3yr thought this over and then said, “Yeah. I thought so. Brown throw up smells REALLY bad.”

9. Seth-2yr handled the situation better than anyone else I know would have. He bugged his little eyes out, accepted the blanket I offered, and waited the fifteen additional minutes it took for me to get us home and get him out of his car seat. THen he said, ‘thank you.’

10. Tonight Caden-3yr sweetly asked me to clip his ‘Toe Fingernails.’ Then he changed it to ‘Feeternails.’

11. Yesterday Mike told me that someone had nominated me for Sexiest Mommy Blogger (something like that) on some site. And that it wasn’t him. I suspect y’all do that just to crack me up, because there’s no way you find all this poo talk sexy.

12. Don’t try and find it and vote -you’ll get all kinds of spam in your email. Like Mike did, when he voted.

13. Serves him right for missing all the brown throw up.

14. And brown really IS the worst kind.

~hm

7 Comments on “Diffusing Disgusting With A List Format”

1
Shalee
December 5th, 2007
3:22 pm

Ugh… to the nth degree. I’d be glad to miss all that brown too.

2
LaLa
December 5th, 2007
5:11 pm

I’m holding my nose and pretending the gross isn’t there (your method, too, correct?) but I have to say, Caden is on a word-smithing tear! Poop-anado and feeternails. And he’s only 3. Aw. A prodigy.

3
Linda
December 5th, 2007
9:45 pm

Poopanado! I just love that word! LOL!!!

That is what I heard…brown throw up is the worst.

After all of that and you can still be sexy too…that is great favor from the Lord. So you mean I can’t vote for you?!

4
emily
December 5th, 2007
11:47 pm

ew!! just the idea of brown puke makes me a little queasy.

although i will vote if you’ll tell me where — i already have a spam email account. :D

5
Fizz
December 6th, 2007
3:03 am

Thanks for making me laugh out loud tonight! Poopanado… feeternails… just the invented words are hilarious. :)

6
Grace Whisperer
December 9th, 2007
4:16 am

You crack me up!! Not only did I laugh out loud, but I’m still wiping the tears from my eyes!! Thanks so much for all the disgusting details!! I SO needed that laugh tonight!

Feeternails!! Love it!

7
sheena
December 12th, 2007
7:47 pm

Oh wow! It is soo good to be at your new place and reading about puke! I have missed you and no I am not being sarcastic. You keep life real and very funny. I haven’t kept up on any favorite bloggers lately due to some courses I have been taking and now I finally get a break to be human and visit your new site! We have a permenently puke smelling car despite scrubbing with carpet cleaner and febreeze…it won’t go away! Any ideas? Just thought I’d ask since you’re having all kinds of experience with brown puke and all…ha! Still love ya and I have missed you!

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