This past Saturday morning, the snow was falling. Again. Even though it’s West Texas and we’ve had enough snow this year to match the last five years. And my mom really wanted to go somewhere. In the snow. Early.
A few days before she had put on an almost-never-used voice I will call the Guilt Trip Voice and said, “There’s this mother daughter thing that I want us to go to…”
At which point I thought, ooooh I am SO gonna hate this. Whatever it is. I’ll hate it.
And then she turned the computer toward me and showed me an article about a Very Large City Wide Type Garage Sale.
I am NOT a fan of garage sales. eBay? Oh yes, please. Garage sales? No. Things tend to smell funny. And there are people there you have to interact with.
So that’s why she needed the Guilt Trip Voice. And to sell it to me like it’s a “mother-daughter” thing. It’s not. It’s a big garage sale. But she’s my mom. And I’m her daughter. So we have to give her that on a technicality.
If we got there at 8 am, we could pay more to get in, but there would be fewer people. So we did. At 7, I called and told her I was on my way and would she PLEASE poach an egg, mmm, so hungry, please Mom?
She did. I got there. It was still dark. And icy and snowy. And her cat was NOT happy to see me, and kept looking behind me to see if I’d brought three small boys, but I didn’t and he was relieved. As was I.
And you know? It was not that bad. I don’t want to do it again anytime soon, but it wasn’t that bad. My favorite moment was when my mom picked up this leopard print, C shaped, neck warmer looking thing and it started vibrating in her hands and she couldn’t turn it off and I was facing a wall and trying not to fall over laughing and ended up doing that painful stomach clench thing that’s real effective when you’re trying SO hard not to laugh audibly…? You know that move? And then I spit. By accident. Since I’m never an intentional spitter. (It’s hard even at the dentist’s office, yaknow?) But I just couldn’t help it since she couldn’t turn it off, and I still don’t know what that leopardy thing was and I”m just glad I wasn’t the one who picked it up and I hope they gave someone a real deal on it, what with the spit and all.
But I really do think it was just a neck warmer thing.
But we bought books and blocks for the boys and other things that start with B. My mother bought a book for Sandra Bullock. She and her sister had talked the night before, at length, and with great empathy and sincerity about what the two of them could do for Sandra and they hadn’t come up with any ideas. But then Mom found a book. She’s sweet like that. Any time my sister or I have a problem it’s only a matter of time before Mom very sweetly presents us with a very thoughtfully chosen book that she thinks will be helpful. It’s just what she does.
We decided the morning had been fun. It was all okay in a very mother-daughter-plus-Sandra Bullock sort of way.
By the way. You know what happens when I try out that particular Guilt Trip Voice on Seth-4yr to get him to give me a bite of his pizza? Nothing. It doesn’t work. Which is ridiculous, because I all I wanted was ONE bite of pizza and not too long ago he breastfed around the clock every few hours for a whole YEAR. I mean… come on.
ONE bite of pizza. That his own little body did not even have to produce.
But whatever. Maybe that voice doesn’t work on 4 yr olds.