Sunday, December 5th 2010
The Elusive, Stylish Spit Cup

So Jennifer Sullivan says it’s called Pine Mouth when you eat rancid pine nuts and have the world’s worst and lingering taste in your mouth, and she gave me lots of suggestions to try in the comment section of the last post. And I’m grateful! I got up and went to a health food store Saturday morning and bought aloe vera juice, aloe vera caplets, and charcoal pills. I took two aloe vera caplets. This is the extent of my attempts to solve the pine mouth thingy. And discreet, at-home spitting. Meager, huh?

Well, also there’s an unfortunate strategy of eating that helps a little. SNARF super fast, just like you tell your kids never to do because it’s tacky, and the metallic aftertaste can’t kick in til you’re done.  I’m not a ‘here, let me take a pill or a vitamin’ type. Or drink anything besides water, diet coke and the rare coffee. (okay, fine, I had a bloody mary a few months back) So it was surprising I even went and got such items, but it would have been truly shocking if I’d ever actually fully employed them.  But if you have a weird symptom, come here and ask Jennifer Sullivan for help! I strongly recommend her!

As with all distasteful issues, I tend to just smile and say “I’m fine” until it goes away. I’ve defaulted to this for pine mouth. Of course, when you do this, you end up with a lot more distasteful circumstances in your life than are strictly necessary than say, if you actively eradicate them. I know.

In other news. I can hardly move. In a good way. 4 other people and I went to the kickboxing class on Friday night and it was gloriously, wonderfully, excruciatingly difficult. (for ME. not for those other 4 people who are in way better shape.)  I was afraid I would have forgotten how to do everything. Or that I’d hurt something. Or that I’d find that class has lost its ability to erase my emotional issues. Only that last one needed to be a concern, but it was sort of that one that meant the most to me. Maybe next time.

I have three REALLY out of control kids in the living room, one disgusting taste in my mouth I don’t want to address in a meaningful way, and poor motor control due my odd choice of how to spend a Friday night. I think it’s time to strap them into seatbelts and go look at Christmas lights. My arms are sore, so not sharp turns allowed.

Also, my car needs a spit cup.*

*What IS a spit cup anyway? Where would you buy such an item? Are they marketed under a title less disgusting, and I’ve seen them before and just didn’t recognize their true purpose? I’ve never seen a silver, engraved spit cup at Things Remembered in the mall… have you? I’m picturing those adorable little Dixie paper cups my friend Christal had in her bathroom back in 1980.  Those would be disposable and darling. And spit cups sound so revolting that of course, they should be darling. Except I haven’t seen those little dixie cups since… 1980.


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