As soon as you tell the internet that you have an unholy, unethical financial agreement with Victoria’s Secret that you really don’t want to end… it stops. Victoria forgot my secret January birthday after all. And my secret February birthday. I have no right at all to be pouty about this… so, eh, yaknow… i won’t be. much. ish.
A version of the following ridiculous scene has played out TWICE in the last few weeks at our house:
Seth-5yr calls lingerie “Yadee Things.” For “lady things.” And he gets VERY annoyed when he picks the bathroom lock at 6:45 in the morning and sees me in Yadee Things blowdrying my hair.
He’ll shake his head and turn to Caden-6yr. I turn off the hair dryer in time to hear Caden-6yr say, “I KNOW. She tells US to get dressed in the morning.”
Like, GEE can you believe the HYPOCRISY we must endure?
Seth-5yr puts his hands on his hips and gets right to the point. “Mom. I don’t really yike it when you yook yike dat.”
Seth-5yr is a straight shootin’ little thing. And usually I like that about him. Respect it, even. But this is a notable exception.
Caden-6yr nods with an expression on his face that expresses total agreement with what his brother has said.
“Boys, if you don’t LIKE this, then DON’T PICK THE LOCK. Maybe you could KNOCK. NEXT. TIME. and I’ll grab a towel. OKAY?”
They look at each other in surprise. This had not occurred to either one of them.
“Oh! Yeah. Yet’s do dat. Come on,” and then they disappear and I don’t call after them to see what it is they wanted in the first place. They’ll be back.
I do not explain the concept of being “still undecided on what to wear that day.” This is one of those areas that, instinctively, I know the numerous males in the house will not comprehend. I also do not explain the concept of privacy or the significance of the time being 6:45 am. Generally, I don’t explain anything at 6:45 am, and it is definitely not my finest mothering hour. So to speak.
I think I need better locks.