Wednesday, May 18th 2011
Writing Students

Helloooooo!

Those of you who come here from a writing class… you know who you are.

I, however, do not know who you are but would like to.  It’s that point in the semester when some assignment of yours has you all show up here. My question iswhy? What exactly is the nature of the assignment? Does your instructor say, “Visit this site – this is an example of everything NOT to do. Note the punctuation, lack thereof, stream of consciousness style, and lack of clarity on anything but overload on the indulgent descriptions of nothing…”  Or… what?

I’ve asked y’all in years past.   No one ever volunteers the dirt, though. I want the dirt. It won’t hurt my feelings. You don’t know that because you’re new here, but it’s true. You won’t. Thanks!

If you’d rather email, go right ahead! it’s kelseykilgore at gmail dot com and you can be the kind soul who solves this mystery for me at last! I’d be so grateful.

 

~hm

14 Comments on “Writing Students”

1
Jan
May 18th, 2011
9:07 pm

If I were still teaching writing, I would send my students to your site to see how someone can write outrageously funny stories without being snarky, write very descriptively, and — most importantly — what it means for a writer to “find her voice”.
Jan recently posted..Mothers Day 2011

2
Kelsey
May 19th, 2011
12:48 pm

JAN! that is just about the nicest thing I’ve ever heard. Thank you. Because i know and love and respect you that meant more than you probably know.

3
Jan
May 19th, 2011
7:14 pm

Kelsey, I taught writing for over 25 years, and although I mysef am not the most talented of writers, I do recognize exellent writing when I read it. Yours is the one blog I go to every single day. I love you!
Jan recently posted..Mothers Day 2011

4
Jennifer Sullivan
May 20th, 2011
12:18 am

So I have check in on your comments three times today because I am nosy and really wanted to know why writing students were visiting your blog. Have decided that until someone tells you why they visit you I will just assume that they are all aspiring Christian writers and your website and book are used for inspiration.
Jennifer Sullivan recently posted..The Control Freaks pre-natal expense list

5
Michele
May 20th, 2011
5:46 am

This just confirms what I’ve been thinking all along!
I’m going to give you some advice right now and if you don’t follow it, I’m going to plagiarize your entire blog from start to finish and do it for you!

1). Realize your blog is an incredible work of art, an inspirational life journey and an exciting read. Go, right now and have the entire thing published into several books–as blog entries, yes. It would probably be a first, but that’s okay. It’s not much different than a public diary. It will sell like wildfire and I’ll be annoyed one day when I walk into my homeschool mom’s meeting and they’re all blabbing about your books together and I try to say “Hey, I know her. We’re like…friends…in an internetish kind of way…” but they’ll all ignore me because I don’t own your book yet. Seriously, this would sell. Not everyone can take their computer with them wherever they want to have an entertaining read while they wait for whatever. This needs to be done. Plus it will make life easier for writing teachers. They can just put your books on their required reading list. Or probably use them as textbooks in class.

2). Hire someone to put your entire blogs–from start to present–in an audio format or on podcasts. This would take a VERY talented reader. Possibly an actor–a southern one. Then sell them! Or give them away free, if it’s just downloading a podcast. Stop depriving blind women of this divine pleasure!

3). You’re awesome. You’ve revolutionized a writing style that instantly cues the reader in to your flection, tone of voice and even the speed with which you say things. You’re like the Mark Twain of modern day. Stop being surprised that writing teachers are doing this. It just means they’re smart and recognize your unique talent. (Take advantage of that)!

6
Michele
May 20th, 2011
5:49 am

In case you still don’t get it: You know how the movie The Matrix revolutionized filmography and forever after that, every movie had to be filmed the same way, if it wanted to be cool? Well, I suspect you’ve done that with writing. It will just take a while to catch on. Especially if you don’t publish these blogs into a book.
Michele recently posted..The Farm Life

7
Kelsey
May 20th, 2011
4:08 pm

ALL:
sometimes y’all are so insanely nice to me that i have no idea what to say in return and so i just go away without saying anything and then think back on kind words that you left for me and i smile all day. or cry. or, like right now – both. or i think about how y’all wouldn’t REALLY say those things if you really knew me because I am just nothin special in real life, but then THAT sounds awful so i shouldn’t really be thinking THAT. i’m just SO honored to know y’all. I have a file in my email where I store ‘nice things people say’ and i go through it whenEVER needed, and all of y’all just got copied and pasted into that folder. thank you.

Specifically…
Jan:
you just melt me. you know i think finding a ‘voice’ in writing was way easier than the constant pursuit to find one in my nonwriting life. still haven’t. still looking. this seems so backwards…

JS: Ha! I’m not very ‘tech-y’ at all. I’m sure you know that about me by now. But sometimes I’ll check the incoming links. And 95% of the time it’s someone googling ‘holymama’ or ‘kelseykilgore’ — but twice a year there are all these links that look something like writingclass3830/session342. And there are people who visit from that type of link for about 2 weeks… but no one ever tells my why. i
like your theory, though!

Michele,
You are ABSOLUTELY my internetish friend, and don’t question that because hello? then I will think you are out there thinking that I am NOT your internetish friend and I always think of myself definitely, no question, as THAT so your secondguessing is contagious, so no more of that allowed! (i bet you even understood that the first time through, right?)
1) that’s SO humbling and adorable and sweet that you even said all of that. I HAVE thought that maybe I should put all of this in printed out, book like form, but to be perfectly honest it was always in the context of Things I Would Do For My Children That They Would Not Appreciate If I Found Out I Had 6 Months To Live. But, hey, commercial appeal? That’s…. not something that had once ever occurred to me. People would pay for these runon sentences? Fascinating.
2) Podcasts? I am so not tech-y. [see above note to JennS] I kinda barely know what those are, and have never actually listened. Do you ‘listen’? I was going with the verb ‘use’ in that sentence but that made the noun sound like crack.
3) and THANK YOU for that, for no other reason than my mother called this morning and was all, “well…! I am feelin like mark twain’s mother today!” and you’re quite the communicator if you can make the effects of one compliment stretch to two generations. : )
4) I did not actually see the matrix, but this analogy amused me and flattered me and made my face hurt all day because YOU ARE SO STINKIN CUTE. i didn’t see it because the previews all looked so DARK. you know? I mean that literally. they looked soooo void of actual light, like you’d be squinting through the darkness to see more dark things zooming around in some more bleak darkness, and there’s this thing about me where I’m all about BRIGHT SHINY LIGHT, SUN, SUN, SUN and it just depressed me to look at. So… the only thing i remember about the matrix aftermath was that people started doing weird things with their taillights. right? or am i imagining that?

8
Jan
May 20th, 2011
6:29 pm

I do know you. and Mike. and the boys. and I still say those things. You are adorable, and write just the way you talk, which is incredibly difficult to do, and even more difficult to teach.
Please, please, please, come see us again soon.
Jan recently posted..Mothers Day 2011

9
Jan
May 20th, 2011
6:30 pm

Oh yeah, and what they said, about publishing a blog book–do it.
Jan recently posted..Mothers Day 2011

10
Michele
May 20th, 2011
9:42 pm

Yep, do it. My only hesitation would be how personal they are, but maybe that doesn’t matter. I mean, if Opera’s mom can do it to Opera, or whatever. I’m glad we’re internet-ish friends, lol! And the Mark Twain thing was just because I remember my AP English teachers making such a fuss over how talented he was to be able to phonetically communicated accents to his readers who might have never heard those accents before. And that’s what you do, only in a different way–with flection, sarcasm, style, etc…
Michele recently posted..The Farm Life

11
Michele
May 21st, 2011
9:33 am

T_T
That was supposed to be Oprah. I need to learn NOT to type late at night or early in the morning.

12
Kelsey
May 21st, 2011
10:42 am

jan and michele
will definitely consider the publishing idea… if only for the kids’ sake. i’m sure they’d love to one day see all the weird stuff they do and say in print form. they actually don’t even know about this site, so they’d be shocked. i’ve told them. sure. but do they get it? um… no way.

michele,
oprah – i knew who you meant! sometimes you’d be surprised how creatively you can write when it’s late and you’re tired! it may come out WEIRD, or with the occasional typo, but it can still be worthwhile…! (i found out by accident)

13
Sara
May 22nd, 2011
7:50 am

I love your blog. It makes me laugh, it makes me cry, it helps me trust the Lord more, it helps me find humor in my own life with 3 sons…
I’m not much of a writer but if I taught a class on writing, I’d certainly send people to your blog!

14
Holy Mama! » Distraction
May 23rd, 2011
2:30 pm

[...] *writing students…. please go HERE first* [...]

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