Maybe I’m just more tolerant of displays of female anger, and all, in light of last week – BUT.

I think the Ohio lady who got arrested for spraying officers with breast milk should be freed and official records wiped clean of the whole incident because DUDE – it happens. You know? I’ve done worse stuff purely by accident and perfectly sober, like EVERY day of my life and let’s just free up a bed in prison for someone else, and let the nice lady go.

It really does happen. Tell me you haven’t been lactating and some baby nearby gives a cute little cry and milk didn’t shoot off into nowhere that you intended. RIGHT? As if you could STOP THAT? Uh, NO! It HAPPENS, and thanks a lot God, because that can be so awkward – but really. NOT THE DRUNK OHIO LADY’S FAULT. Sure, she shouldn’t have been drinking so much so that it didn’t make sense not to say, “hey. I am a breastfeeding mother and to show you I will now remove my breast from my dress as a visual aid so you will understand” – at which point milk went flying – but just because the milk sprayed does not mean it was intentional.

There was not necessarily intent, and that matters!  THAT is my point. Milk is hard to contain and can be difficult to predict and it should not simply be assumed that it was intentionally repurposed into a liquidized weapon, trajectory perfectly calculated, and the result being a successful assault against peace officers. (And, the obvious which I cannot help but add: It’s MILK. Like, with nutritional value. From a BOOB. Is this REALLY a felony?)

She’s a special ed teacher who is not in the news for having sex with her students and so I really like her already. I’m a fan of teachers who do not have sex with students. She may face the additional felony charge of ‘harassing a law enforcement officer with a bodily substance’.  Felony. Seems a bit much.

I’m on your side, Mrs. Robinette. I had a similar accidental milk spraying incident also at a wedding reception once, thanks to a hungry baby I will not name out of pure love and the WRONG choice in clothing but I was feeling fat and it was the only wedding appropriate attire that fit my post-baby body even if it was too stretchy on top and the hungry kid yanked down on the fabric and yeah, whatever. Milk happens. QUITE a memorable wedding reception.  My incident was without anger and without alcohol, but I can make a complete idiot of myself while perfectly sober and trying NOT TO and so I know. These things just HAPPEN.

Ohio? You can call me as a witness. This stuff totally happens, and I’ll be happy to testify.

(Besides, there’s some great blog friends up there I’d love to meet.)

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