I’ve been busy. Painting. You’d know that if you could see me, because I have a Kate Spade-ish green spot on my right forearm and a streak of the same color running through my hair. Oops. That’s the color I’m painting Caden-7yr’s room. Ethan-11yr has settled on an orange-y gold color that is spattered across my stomach. It’ll be a colorful week for me.

Last week i painted 2 bathrooms, and then Seth-6yr’s room. He requested a very pale blue. When this particular shade of very pale blue is streaked through my boring brown hair, it looks as if I have had a major life crisis and turned gray in sudden and dramatic ways.

Tip: do NOT show up to a counseling session like that if you can help it. It’s potentially alarming to mental health experts.

The change of the household from a One Dog Family to a Two Dog Family is going fairly well. The two dogs ADORE each other. When they can be around each other, they hold paws and lick each others’ ears and snuggle and play and gaze at each other lovingly. Most of the time.

However.

Callie is a younger woman, and she has never heard of the concept of ‘hard to get.’ She actually may be a little bit of a dominatrix. Duke was at first scared. He’d look at me all big-eyed like, “she’s really great… but she’s ALL OVER ME ALL THE TIME AND SHE’S KINDA WAY TOO MUCH WOMAN FOR ME, HALP.”

And then he got over it. What a dog.

I’ve tried to lay down some rules for appropriate dog behavior. Callie got ‘fixed.’ Then they were kept separate so that hormone levels would drop and then there would be no… inappropriate dog behavior. But I’ve still used the word “humping” way too often for one lifetime (as in, ‘NOOoooOOO HUMPING!’) and then yesterday I had a long conversation with Callie about how oral sex, sorry, IS still sex, and therefore prohibited.  (you want to do that? get your own living room and invite Duke over, honey, but THIS is my carpet and I just don’t think so.)

I try to say these things when children are not around.

Or anyone else.

I’m hoping they’ll decide to be “just friends” REAL soon.

It has gotten better. Much. But we’re not there yet.

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