I am beyond tired. I was up ALL night long, thanks to the HIGHLY overrated girl next door who is suddenly the object of Duke’s lust.
Duke: The large chocolate labrador. Who really does nothing except lie around and groan and sleep. WHICH I LIKE ABOUT HIM. Until last night.
Last night he did not sleep. He was OBSESSED with going out to the backyard about every hour and staying out there and then scratching to come back in as soon as I’d fall asleep. There are three dachshunds across the alley. I suppose one of them is particularly… interesting right now.
That’s the nice version.
At 3 am it translated to, “IT’S A WEENIE DOG, DUKE. A GIRL WEENIE DOG HO THAT IS NOT WORTH THIS DRAMA I PROMISE YOU THEY NEVER ARE WORTH IT GO TO SLEEP. AND? YOU ARE A LARGE DOG. SHE IS NOT. YOU’D GET ARRESTED IF YOU EVEN TRIED. LEAVE HER ALONE. YOU’RE BEING A TOTAL ONE TRACK MINDED DOG AND… AND… WHAT’S THE WORD…? AH. ANTHROPOMORPHIZING. THAT’S WHAT THIS IS. I DON’T CARE. GO TO SLEEP. YOU ARE NOT GETTING LUCKY TONIGHT OR ANY OTHER NIGHT WITH THE GIRL NEXT DOOR. AND EVEN IF SHE’S NOT A HO DOG, SHE’S WAAAAAY TOO SHORT FOR YOU.”
But he pretty much did NOT believe me. And then the cat started chasing moths (what with all the lights going on and off all night) all over the place and that didn’t help.
Callie seemed bewildered by all of it. I did not have the heart to explain it to her.
This could last 21 days. I know, because I started my day by googling how long a dachshund is in heat. And if you begin your day like THAT, then it might be a really rough day.