Monday, July 23rd 2012
Prairie Dog Chic

So. If you’re thinking of starting a business, it should include as many of the things you like as possible. I think.

I like some weird things.

Yesterday I had a serious email conversation with a woman on Etsy about if she might be willing to add a tiara to an image of a  prairie dog (named Laura) in a formal gown for me. (She was. It totally makes the look work now.)

I like junk. (Separate on the list because NO, anthropomorphic rodent art is NOT junk.)  But not just any junk. Only swirly, curvy, elegant junky stuff that will look so much better if I put a splash of color on it or dress it up in some other way.

And I really REALLY love power tools. This IS the year I’ll learn to weld. Projects in need of it already in line in the garage.

I like getting dirty and sweaty and nasty and making messes. Being totally justified in wearing my nastiest, ripped old jeans is a sweet bonus.

The whole chandelier/ birdcage thing is cute too, but not in the sometimes overdone shabby chic way. More in a… well. That is  different sort of way.

I’m really into animals in drag. There’s a tall, topiary reindeer in the dining room right now with a hot pink fascinator and an aqua blue choker. I won’t be selling her. I LOVE HER. Him. Her. Whatever. Big antlers. Big jewelry.  My gorgeous tranny deer. I’d like to find a whole lot of her friends and dress them up, too, and populate the boring corners of other people’s dining rooms as well.

Big carved angel wings. Painted funky.

Giant carved picture frames. Painted.

Felty ball garlands.

LOTS of different textures.

Crystals and fringe and beads and the occasional feather. Vintage maybe, but not retro.

Bargain and free. (As Caden-8yr says, “everything you’re buying is either cheap or free. WHY?”)

I met my junk fairy this weekend.  A BARGAIN JUNK PERSONAL SHOPPER, thank you GOD, i didn’t even know You made those. I was at his house the other day and realized that ANYTHING I asked for… he had.

Birdcages? Yes.

Chandeliers? Here are 3.

I like old, pretty metal vents. Here are a few.

How about… all your swirly wrought iron stuff. Here, here, and here.

Wooden furniture with curvy legs and empty picture frames and prissy, metal wall sconces? Sure, of course, and over there.

Wooden exterior hinged shutters that are falling apart that can be used as chippy room divider things? A friend of mine wanted those. YES. Here you go.

Anything I could THINK UP, he had, and for dirt cheap. Or he’d say, “you want THAT!? take it, it’s yours.”  He called earlier because he remembered more stuff he thought I’d like, and he kept calling me “Clarice”  and I got this icky feeling and an hour later I remembered that was Jodie Foster’s character’s name in The Silence of The Lambs. So. That needs to be tweaked.  But that’s fairly minor.

Saturday night Mom and I sat in a smoke filled venue, trying to come up with a list of the stuff that I like and would want to sell,  attempting to define this odd vision. I like peacock colors. I was thinking it could all be called Peacock Chic. But – and maybe this is silly –  I’d like to avoid the whole ‘cock’ syllable. And it’s West Texas. And… it all evolved into Prairie Dog Chic. We were writing and she was sketching and the whole time we were waiting on a favorite cowboy type to show up and sing and waving off a truly flattering number of drink offers.  (that is unnerving. flattering maybe, but HIGHLY unnerving. Come to West Texas, ladies, if y’all like that kind of thing, because everyone is WAY friendly. Personally, I do not like that sort of thing, it makes me want to grab a few of my anti-anxiety pills I’m trying so hard -successfully- to quit.  I remembered way too late that if you want to get rid of a persistent guy in a trucker hat and a cute beard REALLY the best thing to say is probably, “i have FOUR kids.”  I will remember that next time. “I am getting divorced and am therefore technically still married and that means something to me and so no you may NOT… ” to all of his various, increasingly creative offers –  was just way too subtle.)*


SO. Prairie Dog Chic. It’s bright and colorful and sparkly and it takes your plain old crap and makes it into prettier crap. YEAH. Well. Something like that.

(Okay, I’ll keep working on it.)

*Okay, that guy probably deserves a little credit for at least not backing down from a challenge. There’s one sober, vegetarian, shy type there with her mama, trying to consider the marketing strategies for pretty crap and THAT’s the one he wants to convince to go have steak another night? Uphill, losing, ill conceived battle. But he probably should at least get a few points for the beard and for the effort, misguided though he was.


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