Monday, March 4th 2013
All Introspective and Stuff.

I may have gone to bed prettier than a fugitive murderer lady in Texas, but I woke up UGLY with a bloody scratch stretching across my nose.

I was immediately impressed with how well I must have slept, that i had no memory of how or when that had occurred. No jagged fingernails. No sharp objects in bed. No angry cats. Weird.

When you can sleep through something that looks like THAT in the morning… you definitely reached all the deep sleep levels. And, okay,  maybe a nightmare level or two, but not so disturbing that you had to wake up afraid.

I have lost count on how many additional Sunday church services are devoted to the topic of marriage. I’m hanging in there. This week I was sitting at the very back and watching some pretty boy type who was WAY too un-self-conscious about digging in his ear and examining the contents.  I figured it was a good a statement about marriage as any. (And fine, I have a bias against pretty men.)

At almost the end of the sermon, my also divorcing friend and I sat up straight, alarmed and big eyed and looking at each other. Just on the other side of the wall there was a loud FLUSHING sound and we realized all of those prior noises were the sounds of a man in a restroom. And THAT seemed just a good a statement on marriage as any, ALSO.

We will perhaps not sit there again. I came in late due to unforeseen scheduling complications (and FINE, my subconscious’ chafing at another marriage sermon) and had the choice between that particular seat or the one next to the old guy who leers and holds my hand too long during the meet and greet time and gets generally way too friendly with his body language.  So. Good choice, with the selection of the seat with the sound effects and everything. But still.

Marriage. It’s a rather hostile topic with me. Legal developments and setbacks are abundant here today.

Still. Life is good. I’m reminded of that every time someone comes into the store and I help them pick out jewelry for dead people. I’m NEW at this job and it’s already happened twice. They’re grieving and sad and need help thinking through what someone I never met would like to be wearing for ETERNITY, no pressure new girl, so when you get to heaven don’t even worry about all the old ladies who are going to be waiting for you at the gates saying, “WHAT?! YOU PICKED THIS FOR ME TO WEAR ETERNALLY? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!”

Ugh. I cry with the relatives (you would, too) and talk about what they were like and what they liked to wear and didn’t like to wear. Then we usually go for something timeless and ageless and elegant and plastic and made in china. It’s the best I can do, and maybe those ladies will understand.

Precious sweet dead ladies need clip-on earrings. Just in case you need to know. And do not ask me why. Really.  (And I think dangly is inappropriate for death. For life, oh yes, chandelier earrings should be well adored. But not in death. Maybe it’s just me. But hey, I’m the one they’re asking, for some reason, and so there ya go, that is my official professional stance on discount death jewelry: No danglies.)

I’m honored I get this life. Of all the possible lives that are lived in this world… of all the eras and places and situations… God gave me THIS gorgeous life with these three amazing boys and it absolutely takes my breath away how blessed I am. I think that  when i meet the families of these women who have so recently died.

I wonder if they felt the same way about their lives, and I sincerely hope that they did.

And now I’m going to bed. I kinda hope I do not tear my face off while I sleep.

 

~hm

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