Friday, March 29th 2013
The English Language JUST Got Better

Seth-7yr does not normally launch into teaching mode. Ethan-12yr does. And Caden-9yr does. And I do. But Seth-7yr? Almost never will he do this.

I’m so very glad he made an exception.

We were in the car when he began his lecture on Compound Words.  ”Compound words are made up of two OTHER words and they make one new word when they are put together.”

His brothers agreed with his definition. I was impressed.

He continued, authoritatively,  ”Buttocks is a compound word.”

Caden-9yr said, “WHAT? What are you talking about? NO IT ISN’T, DON’T SAY THAT?! WHAT?”

Seth-7yr repeated himself because apparently he had not gotten his message across and we needed a review. “Compound words are made up of two OTHER words and they make a new word when the are put together. SUCH AS BUTTOCKS.”

“NO? THOSE AREN’T TWO WORDS, WHAT?” Caden-9yr was all worked up. 

“Yes. That is a COMPOUND WORD. Buttocks is made up of two words. The first word is BUTT and the second word is OX, like the animal. BUTT-OX. Compound word. BUTT-OX. BUTT-OX.” He repeated his new compound word for us with different inflections, as if this would help us.

It did not.

My mouth was hanging open. Ethan-12yr will usually jump fast into any conversation that involves an animal of any kind, but he was speechless. For once, he failed to conjure up three real or not factoids about the random ox. And Caden-7yr was too frustrated to continue telling him that ButtOx is not the same thing as buttocks and is clearly not a compound word. He resorted to muttering, “stop SAYING that” over and over.

Seth-7yr was immensely pleased with his stellar example of a compound word, his controversial lecture, and the drama he incidentally provoked, which is always a welcome result.

I think this is a fantastic new, compound word. it’s my new FAVORITE word. I had the occasion to converse with a few buttoxes today. Wait, what’s the plural form of this?

Buttoxes? Buttoxen? I don’t know. I don’t care. Earlier I saw someone I knew and muttered, “What a total BUTT-OX,” and then giggled until I snorted.

OH, the English language needed this addition. Thank you, thank you, Seth-7yr!




4 Comments on “The English Language JUST Got Better”

March 30th, 2013
8:32 am

Hilarious! You and your kids crack me up!
Jan recently posted..Trim Healthy Mama: a book review

April 2nd, 2013
10:32 am

I vote for buttoxen as the plural. And I feel sure I am going to need the plural.
Jan recently posted..Trim Healthy Mama: a book review

April 2nd, 2013
12:13 pm

Excellent! ButtOXEN it is!

April 12th, 2013
2:28 pm

Even my husband wants to start using your new word! Awesome.

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